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In coaching clients, I have a tendency to see immediately when a client is using excuses, is complaining, resisting, or over-thinking an assignment. This usually means the client doesn’t want to move forward on a certain aspect of our work for whatever reason. When I press deeper, like I did this week with a client, I often get this:

"I don’t want to feel like a used car salesman. So, I’d rather not do that assignment."

And then the conversation drops. Not another word is said, until I ask:

"So, what does self-promotion mean to you, anyway?" Then it all unfolds, little by little.

The real reason we make excuses around self-promotion is that self-employed people are afraid of what people might think. Our businesses are such an extension of who we are that we are very careful about how we talk about our businesses and what we say to others about it. The problem is (as I’ve said so many times before), if you don’t market consistently, you won’t have clients consistently. Period.

So, how can you stop being afraid of what people might think of you? You need to reframe how you view marketing. Here’s what I usually say to a reluctant marketer:

You were given gifts that no one else has and it’s for a reason. To help others in need. Whether you’re a financial planner, a massage therapist, a consultant, a real estate broker, a photographer, a coach, whatever, you’re doing what you do to help others. You’re their problem solver, their healer, their solution. They’ve got a problem and you can help.

Now, imagine this scenario.

You were given this talent, this skill and problem-solving abilities. And there are people out there who NEED you. They’re waking up in the middle of the night, with their 3 a.m. sweats, tossing and turning because they’re thinking about their problems. They’re wondering who on EARTH can possibly help them. They’re praying for an answer (I’ve done that and you probably have too).

And let’s just pretend that YOU are their answer. You’re got the skills, the talent, and the GOODS to solve that person’s problems. The thing is, they don’t know about you. You’re just not out there enough in a big way.

It’s probably because you’re afraid of being seen as too sales-y. Too promote-y. Too out-there. So, what do you do? You don’t market the way you should. You keep yourself a secret. At the same time, you’re keeping that person in the same state of tossing and turning at night, looking for an answer to their problems.

Without promoting what you offer, your clients in need can’t find you (oh sure, they could possibly stumble upon you at the corner Starbucks, but the chances are low.) They NEED you. So, look at it this way—you have the answer to their problem. You have the talent and the skill, and the product to help them.

But by not marketing, you’re essentially being&ldots;


That’s right. Not marketing yourself is almost a form of greed. (I don’t even like typing that word, let along thinking about it, do you?)

You see, it’s actually your God-given DUTY to promote your services. It’s your life’s purpose to help others. If you don’t get out there in a big way, even if it feels a little uncomfortable at first, then you’re depriving someone of the solution only YOU can provide in your own way.

So, do you want to be stingy with what you’ve got? If not, then go out there and do what it takes so everyone hears about you and what you do. Shout it from the rooftops, join the networking groups, send out those letters and e-zines, and create those joint ventures, whatever. Just do what it takes, do it with conviction, and do it consistently.

You have no choice. You were given this gift. Now, it’s your turn to keep giving. The only way people will hear about you is if you market yourself.


  1. Notice where you’ve been resisting your Client Attraction assignments.
  2. See what’s really holding you back (the fears attached to the resistance).
  3. Think about all those people who NEED you and, by not promoting, you’re being stingy.
  4. Reframe and take action.

As a result, you’ll start attracting a lot more clients and you’ll feel great about it, because now you’ll be coming from a place of conviction, a place of authenticity, a place of solving problems, not from a selling-standpoint. That’s what Client Attraction is all about.

Now, go forth and help mankind, will ya? 🙂

If you don’t know where to start marketing your services, consider getting a copy of the Client Attraction Home Study System™. It’s everything you need to know to create a marketing message that will appeal to the best clients for you. You’ll learn how to decipher what makes your business remarkable, how to create Raving Fans so you get clients to call YOU, and lots of other crucial techniques to help you fill your practice quickly, including how to put together a simple marketing plan that gets you clients and then putting it on autopilot so you can have fun again. You can read more about it and get a copy at (Why struggle when you can just attract clients easily?)

© 2006 Client Attraction LLC. All Rights Reserved

This Marketing article was written by Fabienne Fredrickson on 7/31/2006

Fabienne Fredrickson, The Client Attraction Expert, is founder of the Client Attraction System™, the proven step-by-step program to help you attract more clients, in record time and consistently. To sign up for her freebie how-to articles and no-charge teleclasses on attracting more clients, visit